He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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