You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Randomize
