too bad you live with your parents still
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Randomize
