Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I have fence marks all over my body
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
