it's too hot outside to masturbate.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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