After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
