North Korea, Best Korea!
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize