dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
