You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize