We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
