My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
