He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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