yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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