Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
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