get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize
