Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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