just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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