All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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