Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
