I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
