I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
