Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
