Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
