So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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