My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
