You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize
