I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
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