Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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