ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
