I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
