Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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