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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
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