People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize