he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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