You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
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