you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I will pee on everything he values.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
