help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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