It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
is wine microwaveable?
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Randomize
