I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again