are you still at the devil's house?
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
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