do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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