dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer