Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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