I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
Where did you get a picture of my penis
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
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She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
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Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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