doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
