i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
