We won't sleep together?
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
that's an acceptable place to lick
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Randomize
