I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
soo... how was my night?
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
