Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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