Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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