i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
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